A quick follow-up
If you're wondering how Chef felt about that Scientology episode:

AVC: They did just do an episode that made fun of your religion, Scientology. Did that bother you?

IH: Well, I talked to Matt and Trey about that. They didn't let me know until it was done. I said, "Guys, you have it all wrong. We're not like that. I know that's your thing, but get your information correct, because somebody might believe that shit, you know?" But I understand what they're doing. I told them to take a couple of Scientology courses, and understand what we do. [Laughs.]

(AVC - avclub; IH - Issaac Hayes)
copyright 2006 and excerpted from The Onion, January 4, 2006.

Why Jack Kemp Should be President
EXCERPT from Online Human Events

Keep the Front Door of Legal Immigration Open

by Jack Kemp
Posted Dec 26, 2005

The so-called Border Protection, Antiterrorism, and Illegal Immigration Control Act of 2005 (H.R. 4437) currently under consideration in the U.S. House of Representatives is so overreaching that, in my opinion, it could become the Proposition 187 of the 21st century. It should be recalled that Proposition 187 was a Draconian effort in the mid-1990s by the state of California to drive undocumented aliens out of the country and deter their entry by cutting them off from all public services, including education, welfare and other social services such as medical care. The effect was to drastically alienate Hispanic voters in California from the Republican Party.

H.R. 4437 is so overreaching that it would effectively transform any relative, employer, co-worker, co-congregant or friend of an undocumented immigrant into an “alien smuggler” and a criminal. The legislation’s far-reaching “smuggling” provisions go far beyond any common-sense definition of a “smuggler” and include average Americans going about their business. It also inappropriately conscripts the American business community into the U.S. government’s immigration police force by requiring burdensome investigative and reporting activities where prospective employees are concerned.

In a recent letter to several members of Congress, I urged my fellow Republicans to stand against such ill-advised anti-immigrant policies and not support an anti-immigration movement that is politically unwise and fundamentally at odds with the best tradition and spirit of our nation and our party. Immigrants coming to America do so because the United States is still the city on a shining hill for the poor and persecuted. Most aliens come here out of necessity, looking for work, not welfare, and for opportunities that do not presently exist in their native countries.

In the long run, the best way to fix our immigration system is not to militarize the border or to drive undocumented immigrants further into the shadows. The flood of illegal immigration exists, in large part, because U.S. laws do not provide legal channels to accommodate the labor demand of employers and the supply of immigrants willing to work. An estimated 70 percent of the current agriculture work force is illegal. Current guest-worker programs are capped at 66,000 annually for non-agriculture service industries, the current temporary agricultural-worker program is so bureaucratic that over 40 percent of applications to the Department of Labor are not acted upon until after the harvest, and current laws allow the admission of only 5,000 unskilled workers annually on a permanent basis.

Our country needs immigration reforms that allow undocumented workers of good character who have resided in the United States for many years to apply for documented status; allow those who have lost their status as legal residents, but remain eligible to become permanent residents, to remain in the United States while seeking to regain their status; and help reduce family backlogs by providing more visas for close family members of citizens and permanent residents. We need a guest-worker program, such as that proposed by President Bush, that seeks to fulfill the work of Father Ted Hesburgh of Notre Dame, who said, “Close the back door of illegal immigration so as to keep open the golden door of legal immigration.”

Anti-immigration politicians and candidates fail to realize a few fundamental truths, the most important of which is that we are a nation of immigrants. George Washington famously said in 1788 that, “I had always hoped that this land might become a safe and agreeable asylum to the virtuous and persecuted part of mankind, to whatever nation they might belong.”

The rest of the article

The War on Christmas is Over
We won.

I think.

I don’t think there were any Christmas creche lawsuits out there this year. Most of the dispute seemed to be concentrated in the private sector. Private entities (e.g. Bill O’Reilly, the dread Christian Right) were ragging on other private entities (big retailers) for being overly sensitive to private non-religious types by saying “Happy Holidays” and "Seasons’ Greetings" instead of Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, et al.

Making the season religion neutral at your private place of business is not conducting a war on Christmas. A coordinated government effort to suppress Christmas (e.g. not giving it as a holiday, fining people with outdoor creches on their private front lawns) would be a war on Christmas. That hasn’t happened. And it probably won’t in a country where Christianity is the majority religion.

Businesses have been historically reluctant to allow their employees to discuss religion on the job out of fear of offending people. Maybe the current controversy signals a paradigm shift: shying away from religion is now offensive.

Having said that, “Happy Holidays” and “Seasons Greetings” DOES serve to dumb down the time of year. OK, everybody knows what Christmas is, they know about the Virgin Birth and the Three Wise Men. But who knows about the miracle of Hanukah after the Maccabee’s unexpected, come-from-behind victory against Antiochus? Or the seven principles of Kwanzaa? Or that the real reason my Armenian forebears hold off on celebrating Christmas until January 6 is to honor the Epiphany and not to take advantage of the post-Christmas sales? 'Tis the season to educate the public.

What's Wrong With This List?
The folks at
Nick-at-Nite, T.V. Guide and TV Land have come up with the following list, which purports to be of the "100 Most Unexpected Moments in TV History."



100 HOGAN'S HEROES THE UNLIKELY POW CAMP COMEDY. (9/17/65)

99 SNL DEBBIE DOWNER CRACK UP (5/1/04)

98 BATTLESTAR GALACTICA IN THE FIRST SEASON FINALE, BOOMER IS
REVEALED AS A CYLON, LEAVES ADMIRAL ADAMA FOR DEAD. (1/24/05)

97 ROSEANNE IN "A STASH FROM THE PAST," ROSEANNE FINDS POT AND
LECTURES DAVID, THEN PARTAKES WITH DAN AND JACKIE. LATER THEY
REALIZE THE STASH WAS THEIR OWN FROM YEARS AGO. (10/5/93)

96 YOU'RE IN THE PICTURE JACKIE GLEASON'S GAME SHOW BOMB, MAKES
APOLOGY. (1/27/61)

95 FAMILY GUY FOX'S FAILED SERIES ARE SPOOFED IN THE EPISODE
"NORTH BY NORTH QUAHOG." (5/1/05)

94 VH1 FASHION AWARDS JIM CARREY INTRODUCES ROLLING STONES WEARING A
FIG LEAF. (10/28/97)

93 SOUTH PARK THE S*** SHOW. 162 UTTERANCES IN EPISODE
"IT HITS THE FAN." (6/20/01)

92 THE FLYING NUN SALLY FIELD SERVES GOD, TAKES FLIGHT. (9/7/67)

91 SEX AND THE CITY -- IN SERIES FINALE, BIG'S NAME REVEALED ON
CARRIE'S CELL PHONE. (2/22/04)

90 WILL & GRACE OVER CENSORS' OBJECTIONS, KAREN ADVISES LORRAINE:
"EAT ME." (5/8/03)

89 VMAS COURTNEY LOVE CRASHES MADONNA'S INTERVIEW. (9/7/95)

88 SOAP JESSICA EXORCISES THE DEVIL FROM GRANDSON WITH IMPASSIONED
SPEECH. (3/15/79)

87 DAYTIME EMMYS SUSAN LUCCI WINS EMMY AFTER EIGHTEEN LOSSES.
(5/21/99)

86 STEAMBATH -- BILL BIXBY & VALERIE PERRINE IN THE NUDE, SLIPPED BY
CENSORS (5/4/73)

85 2003 VMAS THREE-WAY KISS: MADONNA, BRITNEY, & CHRISTINA.
(8/28/03)

84 THE DATING GAME PAUL LYNDE IS BACHELOR #1. CONTESTANT: "I'VE JUST
GIVEN YOU BACHELOR #2. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH HIM?" LYNDE:
"GO DANCING!" (6/1/68)

83 THE SURREAL LIFE TELEVANGELIST TAMMY FAYE MEETS PORN STAR RON
JEREMY. (1/11/04)

82 MATCH GAME PANEL REVOLTS: STOPS THE SHOW WHEN THEY DON'T AGREE
WITH JUDGES. LEGENDARY "SCHOOL RIOT." (7/8/77)

81 DUKES OF HAZZARD COUSINS "COY" AND "VANCE" REPLACE ORIGINAL "BO"
AND "LUKE" AFTER CONTRACT DISPUTE. (9/24/82)

80 AMERICAN IDOL WILLIAM HUNG'S "SHE BANGS" (1/27/04)

79 20/20 STOSSEL SLAPPED BY WWF CHAMP 'DR. D'. WRESTLER BANNED,
STOSSEL COLLECTS. (2/21/85)

78 SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE LORNE MICHAELS OFFERS $3000 TO BEATLES FOR
REUNION. (4/24/76)

77 FAMILY FEUD FRED BAEDEKER BOMBS OUT ON THE BIG BOARD WITH INSANE
ANSWERS. (8/9/76)

76 1977 SCIENCE FICTION FILM AWARDS HOST WILLIAM SHATNER SINGS
"ROCKET MAN." (1/21/78)

75 1994 VMAS MICHAEL JACKSON AND BRIDE LISA MARIE PRESLEY "KISS."
(9/8/94)

74 '01 INAUGURAL BUSH DANCES WITH RICKY MARTIN. (01/18/01)

73 MARRIED ... WITH CHILDREN BUNDY'S ADOPT NEPHEW, WHO PROMPTLY
DISAPPEARS. MONTHS LATER, PICTURE APPEARS ON MILK CARTON. (4/24/94)

72 HARDBALL BLUE DOG DEMOCRAT ZELL MILLER CONFRONTS CHRIS MATTHEWS
DURING THE REPUBLICAN NATIONAL CONVENTION IN NEW YORK CITY.
(9/1/04)

71 MARY HARTMAN, MARY HARTMAN DROWNING BY CHICKEN SOUP. (3/4/76)

70 NEWLYWEDS: NICK & JESSICA JESSICA SIMPSON'S "CHICKEN BY THE SEA"
MOMENT. IS IT CHICKEN OR FISH? (8/19/03)

69 '00 DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION, LOS ANGELES AL KISSES TIPPER.
(8/17/2000)

68 THE DICK VAN DYKE SHOW ROB OPENS CLOSET DOOR; WALNUTS AND LAURA
SPILL OUT. (2/6/63)

67 THE MIKE DOUGLAS SHOW -- JOHN LENNON & YOKO ONO CO-HOST. MUSICAL
GUEST CHUCK BERRY PLAYS "JOHNNY B. GOODE," ACCOMPANIED BY WAILING
ONO. (2/16/72)

66 FELICITY THE HAIRCUT. (10/3/99) - USING ONLY STILLS AND NEWS
FOOTAGE

65 GET CHRISTIE LOVE! IN THE ORIGINAL MOVIE OF THE WEEK,
CHRISTIE POSES AS HOOKER, CALLED "N*****." "NO, N***** LOVER."
(1/22/74)

64 THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW PHYLLIS'S BROTHER IS GAY. (1/13/73)

63 2005 MASTERS TOURNAMENT TIGER WOODS' TRULY AMAZING SHOT.
(4/10/05)

62 EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND MARIE'S VAGINA SCULPTURE. (10/22/01)

61 DYNASTY THE MOLDAVIA MASSACRE. (5/15/85)

60 THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW AFTER AN OVERLY-FRIENDLY ENCOUNTER, LARRY
QUESTIONS DAVID DUCHOVNY'S SEXUALITY IN THE EPISODE "EVERYBODY
LOVES LARRY." (11/13/96)

59 THE STAR WARS HOLIDAY SPECIAL THE LEGENDARY CBS GALACTIC
SPECTACULAR. (11/17/78) PHOTOS ONLY

58 FRIENDS AT ROSS'S WEDDING IN LONDON, MONICA AND CHANDLER IN BED.
(5/7/98)

57 HERE'S LUCY JACKIE GLEASON'S SURPRISE CAMEO AS RALPH KRAMDEN IN
EPISODE #2, "LUCY VISITS JACK BENNY." (9/30/68)

56 SOPRANOS "LONG TERM PARKING": ADRIANNA GETS WHACKED. (5/23/04)

55 JIMMY SWAGGART TELECAST SWAGGART TEARFULLY CONFESSES TO ADULTERY
BEFORE A NATIONAL AUDIENCE. "I HAVE SINNED AGAINST YOU AND I BEG
YOUR FORGIVENESS!" (2/21/88)

54 WHAT'S MY LINE A BLINDFOLDED FRANK SINATRA IS ONE OF THE
PANELISTS WHEN MIA FARROW, HIS NEW BRIDE, IS INTRODUCED AS MYSTERY
GUEST. (11/27/66)

53 COP ROCK STEPHEN BOCHCO'S MUSICAL SALUTE. (9/26/90)

52 TEXAS AT CLEVELAND JOSE CANSECO'S INFAMOUS "HEAD-BALL" HOMER.
(5/26/93)

51 DINAH! ANDY KAUFMAN AS "TONY CLIFTON" SAYS BULL****. (9/19/79)

50 PASSWORD JACK BENNY GIVES CLUE "ME" TO PASSWORD "MISER" (5/29/62)

49 I MARRIED DORA FINAL EPISODE ACKNOWLEDGES SHOW'S DEMISE: "IT'S
BEEN CANCELLED." "WHAT, THE FLIGHT?" "NO, THE SERIES." (12/18/87)

48 DIANA ROSS - CONCERT IN CENTRAL PARK STORM RAGES, FANS RAMPAGE,
LIVE. (7/21/83)

47 MORTON DOWNEY JR. SHOW AL SHARPTON/ROY INNIS FIST FIGHT AT THE
APOLLO. (8/30/88)

46 '68 DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION, CHICAGO RIOTS; MAYOR RICHARD
DALEY MOUTHS OBSCENITIES. (8/29/68)

45 LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID LETTERMAN SONNY AND CHER: "I'VE GOT YOU
BABE." (11/13/87)

44 BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER MUSICAL EPISODE "ONCE MORE WITH FEELING"
HAS TOWNSFOLK REVEALING THEIR INNERMOST THOUGHTS-IN SONG. (11/6/01)

43 MTV TOWN HALL MEETING - 17 YEAR-OLD LAETITIA THOMPSON FAMOUSLY ASKS
PRESIDENT CLINTON, "BOXERS OR BRIEFS?" (4/19/94)

42 '92 VICE-PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE PEROT RUNNING MATE ADMIRAL JAMES
STOCKDALE ASKS, "WHO AM I? WHY AM I HERE?" (10/13/92)

41 SURVIVOR RICHARD HATCH SLITHERS HIS WAY TO THE MILLION - IN THE
NUDE. (7/5/2000)

40 THE JERRY LEWIS TELETHON TELETHON SHOCKER! AFTER TWENTY-YEAR
FEUD, JERRY LEWIS AND DEAN MARTIN REUNITED BY FRANK SINATRA.
(9/6/76)

39 TWIN PEAKS FIRST APPEARANCE OF THE DANCING DWARF. (4/19/90)

38 GIMME A BREAK! JOEY LAWRENCE APPEARS IN BLACKFACE AT NELL'S
CHURCH BENEFIT. (12/8/84)

37 THE STEVE ALLEN SHOW - ELVIS SINGS TO HOUND DOG (7/1/56)

36 THE WEST WING LEO NOMINATED FOR V.P. (MONTHS AFTER MASSIVE HEART-
ATTACK). (4/6/05)

35 VMAS DIANA ROSS GRAB'S LIL' KIM'S BOOB. (9/9/99)

34 '72 OSCARS SACHEEN LITTLEFEATHER ACCEPTS FOR MARLON BRANDO.
(3/27/73) - PHOTOS

33 MELROSE PLACE KIMBERLY PULLS OFF WIG. (4/27/94)

32 24 IN FIRST SEASON FINALE, JACK'S WIFE KILLED AS CLOCK RUNS DOWN.
(5/21/02)

31 WKRP IN CINCINNATI LIVE TURKEYS DROPPED FROM COPTER. (10/30/78)

30 THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JOHNNY CARSON ED AMES AND THE TOMAHAWK
CHOP. (4/29/65)

29 '84 SUMMER OLYMPICS, LOS ANGELES MARY DECKER/ZOLA BUDD BUMP IN
3000 METER RUN. DECKER DECKED, BUDD BLAMED. (8/10/84)

28 STAR TREK "THE CITY ON THE EDGE OF FOREVER" - JOAN COLLINS.
(4/6/67)

27 THIRTYSOMETHING GAY COUPLE IN BED. (11/7/89)

26 '68 DEMOCRATIC NATIONAL CONVENTION, CHICAGO RIOTS; WILLIAM F.
BUCKLEY BATTLES GORE VIDAL. (8/28/68)

25 LAW & ORDER WHEN ASSISTANT DA SERENA SOUTHERLYN IS FIRED BY HER
BOSS, SHE SHOCKS BOTH HIM AND THE AUDIENCE WITH HER REVELATION, IN
THE FORM OF A QUESTION: "IS IT BECAUSE I'M A LESBIAN?" (1/12/05)

24 THE LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN DREW BARRYMORE'S TOPLESS
BIRTHDAY SALUTE. (4/12/95)

23 SURVIVOR MICHAEL SKUPIN BURNED, MEDIVAC'D. (3/1/01)

22 '88 VICE-PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE BENTSEN TO QUAYLE:
" ... AND SENATOR, YOU'RE NO JACK KENNEDY." (10/5/88)

21 CBS EVENING NEWS WITH WALTER CRONKITE - WALTER CRONKITE PRONOUNCES
THE VIETNAM WAR A STALEMATE. (2/27/68)

20 SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE BARBARA STREISAND CRASHES COFFEE TALK.
(2/22/92)

19 THE PRICE IS RIGHT YOLANDA BOWERSLEY COMES ON DOWN, FALLS OUT OF
TOP. (9/14/77)

18 SIX FEET UNDER NATE DIES (7/31/05)

17 OAKLAND AT PITTSBURGH "IMMACULATE RECEPTION" CONSIDERED GREATEST
PLAY IN NFL HISTORY. (12/23/72)

16 CAL/STANFORD BIG GAME WILD ENDING, BAND ON FIELD. (11/20/82)

15 M*A*S*H RADAR ANNOUNCES COL. BLAKE'S DEATH. (3/18/75)

14 THE DICK CAVETT SHOW GEORGIA GOVERNOR LESTER MADDOX WALKS OFF.
(12/18/70)

13 1996 SUMMER OLYMPICS MUHAMMAD ALI MAKES A SURPRISE APPEARANCE WITH
THE OLYMPIC TORCH. (7/19/96)

12 ER HELICOPTER BLADE RIPS OFF ROMANO'S ARM; SEASON LATER,
HELICOPTER FALLS FROM ROOF, FINISHING HIM OFF. (9/26/02, 11/20/03)

11 NIGHTLINE AL CAMPANIS CLAIMS BLACKS "LACK THE NECESSITIES" FOR
BASEBALL MANAGEMENT. (4/6/87)

10 ST. ELSEWHERE FINALE: ENTIRE SERIES IMAGINED BY AUTISTIC CHILD.
(5/25/88)

9 '94 WINTER OLYMPICS, LILLEHAMMER TONYA HARDING/NANCY KERRIGAN
SCANDAL CULMINATES WITH TONYA PLEADING TEARFULLY TO JUDGES ABOUT A
BROKEN SHOELACE. (2/25/94)

8 SEINFELD GEORGE'S FIANCEE LICKS CHEAP ENVELOPES, DIES. (5/16/96)

7 CAMPAIGN '04 DEAN SCREAM. (1/19/04)

6 THE "HEIDI-BOWL" NBC PREEMPTS FINAL 1:05 OF JETS-RAIDERS GAME
WITH MOVIE "HEIDI". TWO TOUCHDOWNS WENT UNSEEN BY IRATE FANS.
(11/17/68)

5 THE SMOTHERS BROTHERS COMEDY HOUR THE WHO GOES UP IN FLAMES FOR
"MY GENERATION" WHEN KEITH MOON OVERLOADS EXPLOSIVES IN HIS DRUMS.
THREE INJURED. (9/17/67)

4 SUPER BOWL '04 JANET JACKSON'S "WARDROBE MALFUNCTION" (2/1/04)

3 DALLAS BOBBY EWING ALIVE, SEASON NINE A DREAM. (5/16/86)

2 WBA HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP TYSON V. HOLYFIELD. MAN BITES EAR
STORY. (6/28/97)

1 NEWHART SERIES FINALE (5/21/90)

OK, I guess everybody expected Jack Ruby to gutshoot Lee Harvey Oswald on live TV and another passenger jet to slam into the second Twin Tower. Also on live TV.

Trial advocacy professional education
As a lawyer, I feel compelled to recommend this invaluable video, freely available for download, to anyone interested in seeing classic criminal trial litigation at its best.

Emmys All Around for John and Jane Smith
At last, an episode of South Park you can screen at Sunday School...

I've never publicly discussed my viewing of South Park for fear of excommunication from my religion and preemptive excommunication from just about any other religion out there.

Having said that, Wednesday, November 16, 2005 is historic for one thing: An episode aired that could be screened in just about any house of worship anywhere.

"Trapped in the Closet" has Trey Parker and Matt Stone turning their attention to the Church of Scientology, which discusses some of the more arcane features of their theology and also places Tom Cruise, John Travolta and R. Kelly in a closet for no apparent reason.

I will excerpt this article which sums up what happens way better than I can ever hope to:

Scientology Comes to South Park
Radar On Line, November 16, 2005

South Park is the highest-rated show on Comedy Central thanks to its willingness to slaughter sacred cows, but sources say even show creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone are a bit nervous about the blowback from tonight’s episode. Entitled “Trapped in the Closet,” the duo set their crudely animated sights on Scientology and Tom Cruise—topics previously deemed “off limits” due to the actor’s close ties to Comedy Central’s sister company, Paramount Pictures, we’re told.

According to a source who has read an early draft of the script, it begins with Stan visiting a Church office only to be hailed as a savior by the leaders of Scientology because of his off-the-chart results on an E-meter test. A group of Hollywood A-listers quickly gather outside Stan’s house, we’re told, with Tom Cruise somehow ending up stuck in a closet—leading a news crew stationed at the scene to report that Cruise’s fans fervently want the actor to “just come out.”

In the end, R&B star R. Kelly—whose multi-song summer opus gave the episode its name—swoops in to save the day. (We suspect Chef will be sitting this one out. A rep for Isaac Hayes, who supplies the voice of South Park’s horny cook and who happens to be a Scientologist, said her client hadn’t heard about the plot and that she didn’t “think Chef was even in it.”)

The Whole Thing

BUT, this isn't the first time South Park has messed with Scientology. That would be a short they did for the 2000 MTV Movie Awards Show.


Sympathy for the Devil
Los Angeles New Times
September 9, 2001

EXCERPT

Last year, Church of Scientology operatives received an alarming tip: During the upcoming 2000 MTV Movie Awards scheduled for June 8, a short South Park film parodying Battlefield Earth would feature the character Cartman wiping his ass with a copy of L. Ron Hubbard's sacred text, Dianetics.

The tip was erroneous. Cartman would actually be wiping his ass with a Scientology personality test.

But agents of the church's shadowy Office of Special Affairs didn't know that. They only knew they had a public relations nightmare on their hands.

Click here to see how Russell Crowe figures into it

OK, everybody knows Isaac Hayes ("Chef") is a Scientologist. That might explain the general slant of Episode 404, "Timmy 2000" in which the kids all get put on Ritalin (making them all zombiefied VH1-watching Phil Collins fans). Chef tries to break them of this horror by proposing a drug-free treatment for ADD. This aired soon after Tarzan's "You're a Part of Me" beat out South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut's "Blame Canada" for the Best Song Academy Award. You don't want to know what happens to Mr. Collins' Oscar statuette at the end of this episode.

I'll Even Miss Scheer
Why the L.A. Times sucks, cont'd.

I'll miss Scheer, too. His article on President Reagan's passing was in its way touching. I'll excerpt it here:

A nice guy's nasty policies
Separating Reagan's political legacy from his personality

June 8, 2004, Creator's Syndicate

I liked Ronald Reagan, despite the huge divide between us politically. Reagan was a charming old pro who gave me hours of his time in a series of interviews beginning in 1966 when he was running for governor, simply because he enjoyed the give and take. In fact, I often found myself defending the Gipper whenever I was confronted with an East Coast pundit determined to denigrate anyone, particularly actors, from my adopted state. Yet, looking back at his record, I am appalled that I warmed to the man as much as I did.

The fact is that Reagan abandoned the Roosevelt New Deal -- which he admitted had saved his family during the Great Depression -- in favor of a belief in the efficacy of massive corporate welfare inculcated in him by his paymasters at Warner Bros., General Electric and the conservative lecture circuit. Though Reagan the man was hardly mean-spirited, Reagan the politician betrayed the social programs and trade unionism he once believed in so fiercely.

Let's start with his leadership of California, where he launched attacks on the state's once-incomparable public universities and devastated its mental health system. Foreshadowing future trumped-up invasions of tiny Grenada and Nicaragua, he sent thousands of National Guardsmen to tear-gas Berkeley.

It also became increasingly clear that although the man wasn't unintelligent, his ability to mingle truth with fantasy was frightening. At different times, Reagan -- who infamously said that "facts are stupid things" -- falsely claimed to have ended poverty in Los Angeles; implied he was personally involved in the liberation of Europe's concentration camps; argued that trees cause most pollution; said that the Hollywood blacklist, to which he contributed names, never existed; described as "freedom fighters" the Contra thugs and the religious fundamentalists in Afghanistan who would later become Al Qaeda; and claimed that fighting a "limited" nuclear war was not an insane idea.

But to see him as only a bumpkin -- as some did -- was to very much underestimate him. Like Nixon, the Teflon president was a survivor who'd come up the hard way, and many journalists and politicians who didn't understand that invariably were surprised by his resiliency and savvy. Although he generally was compliant with his handlers, whenever the campaign pros or rigid ideologues got in the way of his or Nancy's instincts, they were summarily discarded.

Even when his ideas were silly, his intentions often seemed good. For example, one of his dumbest and costliest pet projects, the "Star Wars" missile defense program, which he first announced when I interviewed him for the Los Angeles Times in 1980, was touted by Reagan as a peace offering to the Soviets.

And his legendary ability to effectively project an upbeat, confident worldview managed to obscure many of the negative consequences of his policies. For example, he made the terrible mistake of willfully ignoring the burgeoning AIDS epidemic at a time when action could have saved millions. Unlike many conservatives, however, he was not driven by homophobia. Instead, Reagan allowed AIDS to spread for the same reason he pointedly savaged programs to help the poor: He was genuinely convinced that government programs exacerbated problems -- unless they catered to the needs of the businessmen he had come to revere.

The whole article

///////////////

This article is striking because Mr. Scheer makes a point out of defending The Great Liberator's character while denouncing his ideology and politics. Reagan was wrong, not evil. This sets Scheer apart from countless other leftists who had loudly set aside bottles of champagne in the fridge for the day The Gipper died.

Why the LA Times Sucks
The Press Release

Excerpt from this morning's L.A. Times

Times Plans New Op-Ed Lineup

By J. Michael Kennedy and Rong-Gong Lin II
Times Staff Writers

November 11, 2005

In a major shake-up of its editorial pages, the Los Angeles Times announced Thursday that it was discontinuing one of its most liberal columnists as well as its conservative editorial cartoonist.

Editorial Page Editor Andres Martinez said that Robert Scheer, a Times reporter for 17 years before he began writing a column on the Op-Ed pages in 1993, will be dropped. Cartoonist Michael Ramirez, The Times' cartoonist since 1997, will leave the paper at the end of the year and will not be replaced.

Martinez, who was recently appointed to his position, said the Op-Ed page will rely more on commissioned artwork and illustrations, as well as stand-alone graphics.

"The opinion pages are the newspaper's town square," he said in a statement. "Our readers expect us to publish all points of view and the broadest range of opinion — from those of our editorial board and columnists to those of our readers and Op-Ed contributors. And we intend to do exactly that."

Times Publisher Jeffrey M. Johnson framed the changes as: "You've got a new editorial page editor and a new publisher. We sat down and talked about the pages and decided to make the changes."

Under a new organizational structure announced in July, Martinez reports to Johnson rather than to the editor of the paper.

Scheer and Ramirez said Thursday that they believed their strong political stances played a role in their dismissals.

Scheer said he thought The Times had grown tired of his liberal politics. "I've been a punching bag for Bill O'Reilly and Rush Limbaugh for years and I think the paper finally collapsed," he said. He said he and Ramirez "both had strong opinions and [I think] the owners think they can improve circulation by making the paper bland and safer."

Ramirez, who won a Pulitzer Prize in 1994, said: "I can't help but think it's also a philosophical parting of ways." He said he also believed his removal was partly due to budgetary concerns, as well as a desire to change the look of the editorial pages.

Ramirez's departure leaves The Times without a permanent staff editorial cartoonist. (Ramirez's predecessor, Paul Conrad, won three Pulitzer Prizes, two of them at The Times).

"You have a newspaper that has such a grand tradition of editorial cartooning," Ramirez said. "I think it makes a lesser product and I think the readers lose."

J.P. Trostle, editor of the book "Attack of the Political Cartoonists," wrote last year in Harvard University's Nieman Reports that editorial cartoon jobs at newspapers are "increasingly left unfilled or are eliminated entirely after a cartoonist leaves a paper." The number of full-time cartoonists at newspapers has shrunk to fewer than 90, down from nearly 200 in the early 1980s, Trostle wrote.

In recent years, the Chicago Tribune, the St. Paul Pioneer Press and others have laid off editorial cartoonists or left the positions unfilled.

As part of the revisions, columnists Michael McGough and David Gelernter will also be dropped.

"I think we've put together a smart, original and provocative team of writers who reflect a variety of interesting and thoughtful perspectives on local, national and foreign affairs," said Times Op-Ed Editor Nicholas Goldberg. "A good column involves a relationship developed with readers over time, and I invite our readers to develop their relationships with these engaging minds in the weeks and months to come.

The rest of the story

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OK, you get rid of your right wing cartoonist and your left wing columnist, both of whom have strong followings, and you still claim to have a variety of interesting and thoughtful perspectives on local, national and foreign affairs? Do the words YOU SUCK!!!!!! mean anything?

The sick part is I really thought they couldn't do worse than Mikey Kinsley.

At least Ramirez (the true spiritual and artistic heir of Jeff MacNelly) is still available through Copley News Service.

You know you're from Southern California if........
YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM SO-CAL IF.......



1. Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.


2. You drive next to a Rolls Royce and don't notice.


3. You don't know anyone's phone number unless you check your cell phone.


4. You speak Spanish, but you're Armenian.


5. Getting anywhere from point A to point B, no matter what the distance, takes about "twenty minutes".


6. You drive to your neighborhood block party.


7. In the winter, you can go to the beach and ski at Big Bear on the
same day.


8. You eat a different ethnic food for every meal.


9. If your destination is more than 5 minutes away on foot, you're definitely driving.


10. Calling your neighbors requires knowing their area code.


11. You know what Tommy’s is and feel bad for all the other states because they don't have any.


12. You don't stop at a STOP sign, you do a California Roll.


13. You really can never be too rich or too thin or too tan.


14. You've partied in Tijuana at least 3 times. You don't remember at least 1 of them.


15. You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.


16. You eat pineapple on pizza.


17. Your cell phone has left a permanent impression on the side of your head.


18. You think that Venice is a beach.


19. The waitress asks if you'd like "carbs" in your meal.


20. You know who the tinsel underwear dude in Venice Beach is.


21. You classify new people you meet by their Area Code. An "818" would never date a "310" and anyone from "323" or "213" is ghetto/second class. Best area code: "949." Nobody likes anyone from the "909" because it stinks there.


22. You call 911 and they put you on hold.


23. You have a gym membership because it's mandatory.


24. The gym is packed at 3pm...on a workday.


25. You think you are better than the people who live "Over the Hill". It doesn't matter which side of the hill you are currently residing, you are just better than them, for whatever reason.


26. You know that if you drive two miles in any direction you will find a McDonald's or a Starbucks.



27. You know what "Sigalert", "PCH", and "the five" mean.



28. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a breaking STORM WATCH report on every news station.

Deja vu for Mike Myers
In looking at Mike Myers' face after Kanye West's remarks over President Bush' presumed dislike for Black people, I am mostly reminded of a similar performance he gave in May of 1994 in an SNL infomercial spoof entitled Amazing Time Savers.